This may not interest you too much, but I really had to say something today about my wife. Now, I won’t leave it there. There are many truths to come from this post. Let’s start.
I was contacted a week or so ago about a possible life-changing decision. It was related to ministry, so I often ponder whether or not I’m the right one for the role. I’m not alone in this pondering. Abraham pondered (I’m too old). Moses pondered (I’m not a great speaker). But God used them anyway. However, I’m just me. I’m no expert in scripture or masterful sermonizer. I just love the Lord.
I talked with my wife and told her of the possibilities. She was very supportive (as if I expected anything less) and asked me questions related to the possible journey ahead description. We sat for a while talking. She reassured me that I would be incredible for what God has in store for me and not to sell myself short.
The difficult thing is this: this conversation happened when she was drifting in and out of sleep. She suffers from quite a few health issues that leave her at home most all the time. One of the reasons she stays home is that she needs LOTS of sleep. As a result, some conversations with her are split apart–I need to allow her time to rest in between.
One morning, I woke up to start to get ready for work. She was not in the bed. This is very unusual for her at 6 a.m. I walked through the house looking for her until I found her asleep in the living room. I immediately wondered if I made her upset, or if she was feeling bad, or if she had a sleep-walking episode (and I wondered those things not because they happen, but because I don’t know why else she would be there!). So I woke her up and asked her why she was in there. The following response was all at the same time adorable, heart-warming, and love-inspiring.
She said, “I came in her to read the Bible and pray for you. I guess I fell asleep in the process.”
This not only made me feel the ultimate support of my wife but also made me love her even more. She got up out of bed at who knows what time of the morning just to read the Bible and pray. There aren’t too many things more attractive to me!
The Proverbs 31 Woman Today
I believe, personally, that there are a lot of Proverbs 31 women out there. Look at your church Women’s Bible Study or Sunday School classes. Many are studying God’s Word and bringing love to church and ministry in ways that only Proverbs 31 women can. There is actually a ministry called Proverbs 31 Ministries if you are interested in seeing it in action. Beth Moore is a popular example of what a ministry can be. She enlightens women all over the world today with her Bible Studies. You can even get purses, bags, and totes from a company that is devoted to the Proverbs 31 ideal. Maybe you have heard of Thirty-One Gifts? My sister-in-law is an incredible woman and represents that company.
But what does it look like in your own household? Have you taken the time to appreciate your wife, fellas, for how she brings life and support to you and your children? Do you know how absolutely fortunate you are? I, myself, know that I’m the luckiest man in the world (not that I believe in luck) because of how incredible my wife is.
It’s not she makes her own sheets, cooks breakfast early in the morning, or works hard into the night. It’s because she is always willing to extend a helping hand to the poor, needy, or anyone who just needs help. She cares so much for her world and everyone in it. She speaks with wise words and “she gives instructions with kindness” (Proverbs 31:26). In today’s world, this is extremely difficult to do. There is so much negativity! She keeps me on track with her words and deeds.
It’s not just because she has charm and beauty (Proverbs 31:30), but she fears the LORD. I recognize this constantly, but sometimes it is the unseen act of prayer that captivates me more than anything. And when I discover it, I’m reminded so much more!
A Note to Husbands
I’m not the perfect husband. I’m not the perfect anything. But we have to realize that Proverbs 31 isn’t just about the women of the world. If we look at the last verse of the chapter, it says:
31 Reward her for all she has done. Let her deeds publicly declare her praise.
Also, we have to remember what is said in Ephesians 5 (after all the wives submit to husband stuff):
25 For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her
28 In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself.
As men, do you get so caught up in the first part of this section that you forget what you’re supposed to do? We are called to give up everything for our wives–not lord over them. More on that later.
Challenge: Valentine’s Day
I personally believe that love should be celebrated every day. No matter what the true story behind the holiday is, the holiday reminds us all to love. Love is a verb, not a feeling–so do something! I know you probably don’t need reminding, but just in case, start thinking now. If you are reading this post after Valentine’s Day, do it anyway! Here’s the challenge:
Do something to show your wife how much you appreciate her. It doesn’t have to be a grand gesture, but make it meaningful. If she is a Proverbs 31 woman, consider not just giving her jewelry, chocolate, or flowers (thought I wouldn’t ever tell you not to give her those things!). But also, consider giving her something to help with her hunger for God’s word. I won’t tell you what I’m getting my wife (she can read this!). At the time of this post, there is less than a month until Valentine’s Day. So if you are reading this after the day, give yourself 31 days to plan your Proverbs 31 gift!
A Note to Wives
You are truly a blessing to this world. The world needs to see more Proverbs 31 women in action–fearing the Lord and showing compassion and kindness. Keep doing what you’re doing! If you haven’t gotten into a women’s Bible study or Sunday school group, seek one out at your church. Take a peek at the links above for Proverbs 31 ministries, Beth Moore, and even Thirty-One Gifts.
For My Wife
The Bible puts it perfectly.
What stands out to you in Proverbs 31? How can your deeds publicly declare praise? I’d love to hear from you!